Preview of Future Insanity
by Ember2010
Summary: This is a preview of a series of one shots staring the main characters of all the assassins creed games, with a little twist.


**_Disclaimer: I do not own the Assassin's Creed series. I am just a crazy fan girl. Assassin's Creed is owned by Ubisoft._**

**Hello everyone, Ember2010 here. So this little bit of insanity is a preview of my future little project called Assassin Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. It features the characters from the Assassin's Creed series in a bit of a different light. As in, their female clones in the not so distant future. The characters in this preview are as followed:**

**Alyssa= Altiar**

**Erika= Ezio**

**Conra= Connor**

**Ella= Edward Kenway**

**Hailey= Haytham Kenway**

**Destiny= Desmond**

**Beck= Rebecca**

**This is a gender bent version of the series. Much insanity to follow. So I hope you enjoy this preview. **

Preview: Conra Asks for Dating Advice

Conra watched Beck as he played video games. She let her face fall onto the table where she was sitting and groaned in frustration.

Destiny walked over and sat across from her. "Are you ok?" she asked her friend.

"I'm fine." Conra muttered into the wood of the table.

"ok." Destiny said, not believing the half-native American assassin sitting across from her.

"I can't believe I am saying this, but …. I need to talk to Erika." Conra groaned.

Destiny looked at her friend. "Why do you need to talk to Erika?"

Conra looked up at Destiny. "She knows the most about boys." She explained.

Destiny rolled her eyes. "What's to know?" she asked, "they are weird and have things between their legs."

Conra sighed. "Well… there is this one that I kinda maybe like." She said into the table.

Destiny was silent. At that moment Erika herself walked down the stairs fixing her makeup. She was dressed in a red mini skirt and denim jacket covering her white midriff tube top.

Conra sat up. "Hey Erika." She said, getting the scantily clad assassin's attention.

Erika looked up and around before she realized that Conra was the one that said her name. "Me?" she asked, pointing to herself.

Conra rolled her eyes in annoyance at the valley girl. "Not the other Erika that lives here." she said sarcastically.

"Oh…." Erika said, looking around for the other Erika.

Destiny face palmed. She may be the new girl but even she knew that there was only one Erika on the Davenport Homestead, and she might as well be a bond.

Conra resisted the urge to face palm as well. "I was using sarcasm." She explained.

"Oh!" Erika exclaimed, finally getting it, and then she realized Conra was the one who wanted to talk to her. The Conra she roomed with and had absolutely nothing in common with. "Uh, what cha need?" she asked, slightly nervous.

"Advice" Conra said, suddenly dreading this.

"…on..." Erika said, needing more information out of the tomboy.

"boys." Conra muttered, glad her darker skin was hiding her blush.

"What about them?" Erika asked.

"Well…" Conra said, "There is this one that I kinda, maybe, possibly might like."

Erika got excited. Conra had never shown any interest in boys before. Finally she had something she could talk to the girl about. "alright." She said, "Here's what you do…"

"Oh. Boy." Destiny said, interrupting her.

Erika ignored her. "Let me doll you up, you go and flirt with him and he will be putty in your hands" she smiled at Conra.

Conra leaned back from the peppy assassin, feeling way too much like a rabbit cornered by a hungry wolf. "Yeah, about that…" she said, "I don't flirt."

Erika gave her a pitying look. "Then I dunno what to tell you."

"How about be yourself?" Destiny offered.

Conra sighed and shot a glance at Beck, who was still playing video games. "Because he doesn't really notice me as myself."

"That's his fault." Destiny said, putting her hand on Conra's shoulder.

"No, it's because of her wear." Erika said, gesturing to Conra's blue tank top, denim jeans, combat boots and messy hair in a ponytail, "she needs a makeover inside and out."

Destiny looked at Erika. "No she doesn't. She's fine."

Erika rolled her eyes. "Uh, no she's not."

"Damn it Erika, You're useless! Go away!" Destiny almost yelled at Erika.

"I was asked over, thank you." Erika said, turning her back to the new girl, "you are useless."

Conra pushed herself up from the table with both hands. "ENOUGH!" she yelled.

Erika and Destiny were silent, Beck glanced over to make sure everything was alright, but none of the girls noticed.

"You two are forcing me to do something I really don't want to do." Conra hissed at the girls.

"You don't want to be yourself?!" Destiny asked, shocked.

"You asked for my help." Erika said, tossing her hair over her shoulder.

"I meant ask Them for advice." Conra growled.

Destiny was silent. Everyone in the house knew who Them was where Conra was concerned. The other two Kenway girls, Eleanor the crime lord assassin and Hailey the Templar. They were Conra's two least favorite people in the world, though she liked Ella much more than Hailey.

Conra held her hand out to Destiny. "give me the phone."

Destiny gave the phone to Conra without a word. If Conra was going to call her older sisters, then this was serious indeed.

Conra punched in Hailey's number then held the phone up to her ear and waited. After the second ring Hailey answered.

"Hello?" she asked in her posh British accent.

"Hailey," Conra said, "I need." The rest of the sentence was nothing but mumbling.

Hailey sighed. "Conra, you need to speak up." She scolded Conra.

"I NEED YOUR HELP!" Conra practically yelled into the phone, frustrated as hell.

Hailey's eyes went wide and she held the receiver away from her ear. "Bloody hell you spoiled brat!" she said, "You don't have to holler! What do you need help with?"

Conra took a deep breath to calm down. "I need advice on boys."

Hailey was quiet for a few seconds, trying to process what Conra had just said. Conra needed advice on boys from her? Conra hated her. "What about boys?" she asked, suspicious of what her sister was planning.

"There is one I like." Conra explained, "And I don't think he sees me like that."

Hailey rolled her eyes. Ignorant naive little sister. "Then forget him and move on." She said, giving her younger sister the best advice that would ensure that she didn't get herself hurt," if he isn't interested in you, you do not need to waste your time on him. It's simple really little sister."

Conra was silent for a while. "Thanks Hailey!" she said in a cheesy, fake-happy voice, "You just reminded me why I don't ask you for advice."

"Happy to help." Hailey said before she hung up.

Conra made a face at the phone before calling Ella.

"What do you want?" Ella answered.

"Ella," Conra said, "I need advice."

Ella winced. "Now?" she asked, "I'm kinda in the middle of something." She ducked behind a dumpster.

"It's about boys." Conra said, confused, "what's going on?"

"boys." Ella said, steering the conversation away from her current activities, "what do you want to know about boys?" she saw a flash of light and moved to hide better.

"What if you like one?" Conra asked, "How do you tell him?"

"well." Ella toned her voice down to a whisper, "you go and tell him flat out. No games. Games are for whores like Erika. And we all know the guys who are attracted to Erika."

"And if that doesn't work?" Conra asked.

"Beat the shit out of him and leave him for dead." Ella said flatly, "he doesn't like you, it's his loss and he needs some sense beaten into him."

Conra stared wide eyed at the phone. "Ok…" she said, "thanks." She hung up and shuddered.

"How'd that go?" Destiny asked.

"Hailey says don't bother." Conra explained, "Ella says tell him and if he doesn't like me back, then kill him."

Destiny thought for a bit. "I like those ideas."

Conra stood up. "I don't. Don't ever ask my sisters for advice. Hailey tends to stick to her damned principles and Ella is too violent."

Destiny shrugged.

Conra walked up to her room and opened the door. "Erika."

Erika turned away from Conra. "I am not talking to you." She huffed, "you ask for help then shoot it down."

Conra sighed, "Because I don't know how to flirt and I have never in my life gotten dolled up."

Erika sighed. Conra needed more help than she knew.

"Will you please help me?" Conra asked.

"Fine." Erika said, getting up out of the vanity chair, "who is the guy?"

"I'm not telling you that!" Conra said defensively.

Erika rolled her eyes and walked to the closet. She pulled out an outfit and handed it to Conra. "Put that on and I'll do your hair and make-up when you get out."

Conra looked at the outfit uncertainly. It looked kinda revealing.

Erika saw Conra was still standing there. "Do it or no help!" she snapped

"Fine!" Conra snapped back, going into the bathroom. She walked out wearing a purple and black plaid miniskirt and a black top that might as well have been a sports bra.

Erika grabbed Conra's Wrist as soon as she got out of the bathroom and pulled her to the vanity. She picked up a brush and started brushing the tangles out of Conra's dark hair.

"Oww!" Conra said as Erika pulled at the knots. "Hey, watch it!"

"Shush or I'm stopping." Erika snapped.

"Ok. " Conra muttered.

Erika finished with Conra's hair and began working on her make-up, humming as she went. Conra sat there in silence, already regretting this.

Erika finished and smiled. "Alright. All done." She said, turning Conra to look in the mirror.

Conra looked at her reflection in the mirror. "I'm not sure about this." She said.

Erika glared at her roommate. "You asked for my help. I'm giving my help. Take it or not. That's your choice."

"I'll take it, ok." Conra said, not really having a choice in the matter.

"ok." Erika said, "Now go to the guy, smile and talk to him. Giggle and twirl your hair every now and then. And then close it with a date and make sure to sway your hips when you walk away from him so he'll be sure to keep his eye on you as you leave."

Conra stared at Erika for a few seconds. "What?"

"You heard me. Go!" Erika said, pushing Conra out the door.

"Ok! I'm going!" Conra said, trying to walk out the door in the high heel shoes Erika was making her wear.

"Good luck!" Erika yelled down the hall.

"Thanks" Conra muttered, "I think I'm going to need it."

Erika waved. "Later!"

Conra went downstairs, trying to walk like Erika had told her to. She decided that running though trees was easier than walking in heels. Somehow she made it to where Beck was sitting. She twirled her hair around her finger. "Beck?" she said, tapping him on the shoulder.

Beck glanced at her to see who it was, then did a double take when he saw what Conra was wearing. "Hey Conra." He said, unsure of what was going on. "Do you need something?"

"I just wanted to talk." Conra giggled, trying to act like Erika when she was talking to boys.

Beck gave Conra an odd look. "Are you feeling ok?" he asked.

"I'm fine silly." Conra answered.

"Are you sure?" Beck asked, concerned.

"Yes I'm sure." Conra said, getting frustrated.

"Ok." Beck said, "You have something on your face." Turned back to his game.

Conra balled her hand into a fist and punched him in the face before walking away. Stared after her, holding a hand over his now swollen left eye.

Conra went back upstairs and took off the cloths Erika had lent her, replacing them with jeans and a t-shirt. Erika was sitting on her bed doing her nails.

"It didn't work." Conra said, walking into the bathroom.

Erika looked at Conra, confused. "What do you mean? It always works."

Conra washed her face in the sink. "I mean he noticed alright. But he just looked at me and asked if I was feeling well."

Erika rolled her eyes. "Geez, please tell me you talked.

Conra looked in the mirror to make sure all the make-up was off. "I did, until he said I had something on my face. Then I punched him."

Erika rolled her eyes.

Conra walked back into the room, putting her hair back up in its ponytail except for the two braids on the right side of her face. "I don't think even you could get him to date you." She joked.

Erika didn't see that as a joke. She saw it as a challenge. "Oh really. Tell me who it is and I'll show you." She said, glaring at Conra.

Conra tied her combat boot. "I am not telling you who I like so you can steal him!" she said.

Erika laughed. "No, you're not telling me because you know I can get a date with him."

Conra glared at Erika. "Given that possibility I am not telling you!"

Erika rolled her eyes. "Whatever."

Conra finished tying her boots and walked downstairs, more worried about her friendship with Beck than Erika. Erika went back to painting her nails before going down into the kitchen.

She walked past Beck who was on his way out of the kitchen holding a bag of frozen peas to his face. She looked at Beck and shrugged before continuing to the kitchen.

Alyssa looked at Beck and raised an eyebrow. "What happened to you?" she asked.

"Conra has a mean left hook." He said.

Erika walked to the stairs with her snack when she remembered what Conra said she had done to the boy she was trying to impress. "wait." She turned and walked back over to the boy. "What did you say happened, Becky?"

"Conra punched me." He said like it was no big deal.

Erika blinked, realizing that the guy Conra liked was Beck; she decided to show the other girl that Erika Auditori can get any guy she wants. "Oh you poor thing" she gasped, putting her plate down and walking over to the gamer, "Why would she do that? Here let me hold that bag of peas for a bit." She put her hand on the bag.

Beck shrugged. "I just told her that she had something on her face." He said.

Erika pouted. "And she punched you?" she shook her head.

"Yeah," Beck said, not sure what had gotten into his friend Conra, "and I don't understand why."

Erika shrugged. "Maybe she is just crazy." She said. She moved the bag and winced, "ouch, that's going to take a bit to disappear. I guess it's a good thing you don't go out much, huh." She gently put the bag back over Beck's swollen eye.

Beck laughed. "That's true."

Conra was sitting in the dining room with Destiny watching the whole thing. When Erika started openly flirting with Beck, Conra crushed the plastic Dixie cup she had been drinking out of and muttered something in Mohican.

Destiny looked at Conra. Conra only did that when she was mad.

Erika saw Conra was watching. She pouted at Beck. "This is going to make it hard to do your gaming." She said, holding the bag of peas and the gaming remote.

Beck took the remote from Erika. "Not really." He said, oblivious to what she wanted.

Conra leaned over to destiny. "Wanna help me hide a body?" she whispered.

"Not now." Destiny groaned.

"Not now." Conra hissed, "I have to kill the bitch first."

"Why?" Destiny asked, glancing from Conra to Erika.

"No reason." Conra said, shooting Erika a glare of death.

Erika was oblivious to Conra's glaring. "You know… I can help hold the peas while you play your games. The swelling should be gone by the end of the night." She told Beck.

Beck shook his head and unpaused the game. "I can rig a thing to do that."

"Oh. Alright." Erika pouted, with her free hand she messed with Beck's shirt. "I was kinda hoping I could help." She sighed, "I guess I'll have to find someone else injured to practice first aid on…" she sighed again.

"Good luck with that." Beck said, continuing on with his current level.

Erika pouted. "Aww, come on Beck, it won't hurt nothing. I mean, best to start off with the small stuff and move up to harder right?"

"Yeah, but I don't need anything else." Beck said, saving the game, taking the bag of peas from Erika, then getting up to go grab a drink from the kitchen.

Erika grabbed Beck's arm and pouted at him. "Please Beck."

Beck looked at her. "Go find Destiny." He said, "She is always hurting herself."

Conra smirked at this. Erika was trying so hard to get Beck and he just wasn't getting it.

Erika pouted at him. "alright." She sighed when it didn't work. She let go of Beck, picked up her plate, then left the room, thinking of how to get him to go out with her. His playing hard to get made her really into him. Besides, Conra was definitely not girlfriend material.

Conra walked over to Beck and handed him a Mountain Dew. "Sorry about giving you the black eye." She said.

"It's ok." Beck said, taking the drink.

"So we cool?" Conra asked.

"yeah." Beck said, "We're cool."

Conra smirked at Beck. "Wanna help me hide a body later tonight?"

"Whose body?" Beck asked.

"Erika's." Conra answered.

"What did she do this time?" Beck asked.

"Flirting with a guy I like." Conra said.

"Which guy?" Beck asked, trying to sound more curious than worried.

"It doesn't matter. Do you want to help me or not?" Conra said.

Beck thought about it for a bit. "No."

"Ok" Conra said. She looked around to see if anyone was around. She was alone with Beck. "Hey Beck?" she asked.

"What?" Beck asked,

"Tell anyone about this and I will kill you." Conra said.

"About what?" Beck asked.

Conra grabbed the front of Beck's shirt and kissed him.

Beck looked at her wide eyed with shock. "What was that for?" he asked

"I got tired of waiting for you to make a move." Conra said.

"ohh." Beck said, "I'm the boy you like."

Conra almost face palmed. "You just now realized that?"

"I've liked you, but I didn't know you liked me." Beck said.

Conra chuckled. "Let's just keep this our little secret ok?"

Beck smirked. "Ok."

**so that is a look at things to come. If you want to see more of this let me know, if not, well i have already been asked to write this anyway. please leave a comment. **


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